Calling all good cookies!

Alright, y'all! I need your help. Remember that 25 before 25? I'm still chugging along with that. I'm almost done with the second step of my dual citizenship (there are 29384 steps, it seems). I am working on that español, reading my Shakespeare, and working on a few other things simultaneously. But we've got a big one coming up FRIDAY and SATURDAY!

I'm working with Theatre Alliance of Winston-Salem on a bake sale and we are raising money for Cookies for Kids' Cancer on November 30-December 1 in connection with opening weekend of Sordid Lives (get your tickets here). Cookies for Kids' Cancer is a 501 (c)(3) that raises funds for pediatric cancer research. All of the funds will be matched by the OXO home supply and GLAD products companies! (If you plan on participating in a cookie exchange, check out the Cookies website to see how you can get them some money, too!) Our volunteers will be contributing their own goodies (and not just cookies!) so if you're in the area, please stop by!

On a more personal note, some people have asked why Cookies for Kids' Cancer. Well, in making my 25 before 25 list, I wanted a shout out to strong women and my alma mater Meredith College. My graduating class became extremely involved with this non-profit, the story of a Meredith sister and her heroic son, and it was a roller coaster ride I'll never forget. Gretchen Holt Witt gave the keynote address at my graduation and I remember feeling like she had make the most of what was delivered to her and went far beyond anyone's expectations. She and those working for Cookies for Kids' Cancer, formally as employees (who are all amazing to work with if you were interested in hosting your own bake sale!), or as other bakers just like my dear friends, or as donors, have made great strides towards helping children--and in an ingenious manner at that!

Relistening to Gretchen's speech and reading about Liam's all too short, beautiful life made me reflect on where I come from, the community I have around me, and the tremendous opportunities I can make for the better of others in the simplest ways. So back in August, I listed hosting a bake sale on my 25 things in an attempt to not make a completely selfish activities. It was a little gesture, but my how much I have absorbed from this moment in the attempts to serve worthily a cause so meaningful! The opportunities are endless for what each of us can do to improve the world. All it takes is that we have a little responsibility in respect to our neighbors.

I'd sincerely love to see you Friday afternoon from 12:30-3pm and before and after the shows which start at 8pm Friday and Saturday night. If you can't be there and still want to contribute to the cause, follow the link to make a donation on our giving page. A big thanks to Theatre Alliance for helping me cross another one off my list and to you good cookies for being along on the journey!

Update 29 November 2012: HUGE thanks to Robert and Bob's Big Gas and Subs for offering to donate some goodies for the cause. Y'all, those subs and baked pickles are the best!

Words of Wisdom

Back at the beginning of September I wrote a post about defining success and two of my favorite poems. Just recently two of my very best friends Jenn and Sheryl graduated from Meredith College and the last two weekends I couldn't be prouder to have had the great opportunity to celebrate their achievements. I was asked to give a speech at Sheryl's graduation party and at my mother's request, I'm posting it here for all of you. When putting to pen to paper, I come to a lot of personal realizations. You'll recognize the poem, but bear with me reusing material (it's really powerful, though), and enjoy my ever developing conclusions!

First and foremost, congratulations Sheryl on completing college and doing so with such growth and achievement. I hope you recognize what you have done for yourself and take this period to be really proud. That was the hardest thing for me to do just seven months ago and one of the few regrets from my own college experience. So enjoy this time because both you and now I know there are greater struggles in your near future than even those you dealt with as a Meredith student.

And so, upon reflecting, I decided to speak about just that – recognizing success. I’ve spent much of my young life pursuing “success” and along the way have asked so many people I consider successful to provide me with their memoirs and road maps so I could get there, too. Now most of you know, but for those of you who don’t, let’s just say I don’t feel like I’ve quite achieved it all yet. So when considering what to share with you, Sheryl, I don’t think I have much authority to say a lot yet. But because I wanted to talk about success quite badly, instead I resolved to distribute the golden nuggets I caught from others along the way. They’ve been useful thus far and figured they couldn’t hurt you either.

So to begin as far back as I can remember, Mrs. Spach, my second grade teacher taught me that I didn’t need to cry about everything and that I could deal with some things on my own. Clearly, I’m still working on some of these things, but she was the first person to tell me that I could make things happen.

Later at the end of the most awful seventh grade ever recorded, Mr. Becker reminded me that some offenses just need to be put to rest so we can revel in the good times.

In high school, the former French military man turned teacher Mr. Tourret directed the student government and I was secretary. One day, taking a break from revolutionizing the school governing system, he told me that there were three types of people in the world. The vast majority were those who transported pianos. Then there were those who played the piano. He told me that I should always try to be in the very small elite group – those who appreciate the music. While I know what he was saying, I think it’s very French. I have since come to believe it’s important to have the muscles to move the piano and the know-how to play because that’s what makes listening to the tune even sweeter.

Then P.T.A. at lovely old Bishop McGuinness brought in Australian life coach Matthew Kelley. Although his book was poorly written, he said something that changed my life and became one of my personal mantras: Be the best version of yourself. In every area of your life – whether that be your career, romantic, friendship, or family relationships, your health, spirituality, or whatever – we should surround ourselves with people, ideas, and practices that make us a better.

Going off to college, my parents reminded me of the same phrases I had always heard from them. Mom said, “Just do your best. And when you do it, you should walk away from every situation satisfied because you know there’s nothing else you can do.” Dad, on the other hand, told me, “Make friends with the custodians, guards, and lunch ladies because they’re the ones with the real power. And make conversation with the elderly because they have the real wisdom.” Words to live by.

At Meredith, my advisor, sweet Dr. O’Dekirk never said anything in particular, but he did have an open door and chair just my size whenever I needed it. That, for me, spoke louder than most others’ words.

My two Italian professors, first Max at Meredith, then Rita during my semester in Siena told me to seek out adventure and trust my heart. But they both warned me to keep my heart open because sometimes what you thought you always wanted will be different at decision time.

Jeff, the ex-pat from Boston, taught me my favorite Italian phrase: “La vita si rinnova,” or “Life renews itself.” Because there are times, he shared, that success is just waking up in the morning.

In a similar strain, is the definition of success I learned from my best friend and college roommate Abbey. Being there through it all, she gave me plenty of hugs and matter of factly informed me, “Move on to the next thing.” Surely, if success couldn’t be found just where I was, it couldn’t be far away…as long as I kept moving forward.

So although I set out to explicitly define success for myself some time ago, I still rely heavily on the sound bites and memories I’ve collected from those I love and who I am lucky enough to be loved by. Yet the closest I ever came to my own definition brings me to my Meredith onyx and my favorite poem…s.

Many recognize the poem “Success” attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson which starts “To laugh often and much” and proceeds to list great things (in every sense of greatness) until the final line and inscription in my onyx: “This is to have succeeded.” But in the name of womanhood, I would like to read the original written by Bessie Stanley. And, Sheryl, as you listen today, call to mind those successes you’ve had and prepare yourself for those in your future.

Success

He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much;

Who has enjoyed the trust of pure women, the respect of intelligent men, and the love of little children;

Who has filled his niche and accomplished his task;

Who has left the world better than he found it whether by an improved poppy, a perfect poem, or a rescued soul;

Who has never lacked appreciation of Earth’s beauty or failed to express it;

Who has always looked for the best in others and given them the best he had;

Whose life was an inspiration;

Whose memory a benediction.

 Once again, congratulations Sheryl and good luck on your future successes. 

This is to have succeeded.

This poem is my very favorite. It describes a definition that I actively struggle to compose for myself. First is the popular form attributed to Emerson, followed by the original which was confirmed to be written by Bessie Stanley. Lines from both resonate heavily with me, especially now as I find myself in the center of the boxing ring with Expectations. She's a quite the opponent, but I'm making the best of the match. Maybe we'll end up friends at the end of it all.

Success
To laugh often and much;
to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
to appreciate beauty; 
to find the best in others;
to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded. 

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Success
He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much;
who has enjoyed the trust of pure women, the respect of intelligent men and the love of little children;
who has filled his niche and accomplished his task;
who has left the world better than he found it whether by an improved poppy, a perfect poem, or a rescued soul;
who has never lacked appreciation of Earth's beauty or failed to express it;
who has always looked for the best in others and given them the best he had;
whose life was an inspiration;
whose memory a benediction. 

Bessie Stanley

Well, it looks like I just might survive alla Universita per Stranieri. One week down and beyond a few mistakes, a couple of ego bruisings, and un sacco di head aches I'm doing pretty well. My class is very challenging and the other students totally know what they're doing. 

You may (or may not) know that I'm a bit of una secchiona. I've really always enjoyed being in a classroom setting and learning. It feels very natural to me, probably in part because I know very little about a life other than that. But back to my point, I'm sure you can imagine what comes along with this kind of personality: being preoccupied by grades, having the utmost attention to details, and caring more about classwork than classmates. But I must admit that this course has put me through a very drastic change in my typical approach to learning.

Since my grade in this course really means nothing to me, I've started really paying attention to the process rather than the outcome. For instance, I push myself knowing that I'm guaranteed to make mistakes, which has always been a limited action for me. Moreover, as I mentioned before, the other students know.their.stuff. While on the other hand, I am understanding about 65-75% of the class, but am missing some of the details (for now). Although I'm a bit behind, I'm working hard and still learning lots. And finally, I'm finding that having a rapport with the other students in the class is just as important as the course content. My intentions here were to learn how to speak. I'm not going to get that development from book exercises alone. We have several activities within the lessons where we can interact with each other, and everyday there's a 20ish minute break (from our 4.5 hours of work) during which I usually go on a walk or take a coffee with my compagni di classe.

My professor's name is Simonetta. She's very kind and has a great sense of humor. Simonetta facilitates all kinds of activities for us to learn. Just this week, we've played Taboo, listened to music, acted, and written a group story. For this morning's "warm up," we were asked to write our own haiku; mine, naturally, was about Il Palio. But in addition to the grammar, we learn a lot of cultural components of the language like idioms and word play among other things. During a lesson a few days ago we were working on gerunds (-ing words for those of you who've forgotten). She taught us a phrase that I've decided to take on as my approach to language learning: "Sblagiando, si impara," or "Making mistakes, one learns." Maybe this is the formula for success? I'm told it's very American. Which is fitting.

Still, there are a couple of things that I have to note that make this course even more different from what I'm accustomed. I find this experience unlike anything else:

• being the only American in a class of about 25-30 people. There are people from all over the world and it's such an enriching experience to be learning about the Italian language and culture in contrast to those of everyone else's. But I really never recognized just how other countries compare themselves to the USA for better or worse. At first, I was nervous to admit where I came from due to all the stigmas that come along with that (almost talking about my nationality as if it was some sort of drug problem), but I'm starting to realize that if I act like I always do, it wouldn't be bad for people to meet a real American.
• being in a class with men. Going to a women's college, I'm not used to the influence of testosterone in a classroom. I only took one class at NCSU and that one was a huge lecture course and never felt I got the full effect. Since this course is very heavy on conversation , I'm not sure that I missed out on too much hearing what these guys have to say (haha!), but am finding myself still learning a lot from their unique points of view. And that's not even mentioning "boy humor." There's really nothing like it....
• since I'm walking to school. Or maybe "hiking" is a more appropriate term due to the Sienese hills. I was riding the bus at first, but to save enough euros for about two trips to the grocery store I've been walking about an hour a day. At first, "American Sam" was completely adverse to the idea of walking that much, but now I find it great way to wake up in the morning for class and give my brain a break in the afternoon. The weather has been wonderful; mid-70s during the day makes the walk perfect.

So although things are completely exhausting right now and my head beats like the drums preparing for the Palio, I know I'm learning a lot...or at least I hope I am. I'll keep you posted.

"I used to talk / With honest conviction / Of how I predicted my world"

Shifting gears

I'm changing directions. Where I've been and what I've been doing has been great and exactly what I needed, but I feel like I could be better serving myself and others by going home. The decision was not the easiest, but at the same time, it felt very naturally like the right thing to do. My biggest fear for this year is that I know the right decisions too late. But I have faith that my search for growth will lead me to good things, to tough things, to complex things and while I am squirming in what is an uncomfortable setting, I will grow into who I am intended yet to be.

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power."
--Alan Cohen

To start things off

I've been thinking a while about starting an everyday blog just for cool things that I find online or strange stories that occur in real life. I was finally moved to do so because I'm off Facebook for Lent. There are a matter of days left until Easter--and I can't believe I've actually done so well--but I thought it'd be fun to have a sound off spot of my own.

Also, I've found some fillers for the time I would have normally wasted on Facebook.  Some things are intellectual and others not so much. My new favorite website is The Atlantic. They give you a chance to come up with how you feel about different issues by bringing articles from different perspectives and also have some really wonderful editorials. Today I read a re-post and decided that it was worth sharing. Happy Sunday!

Please Bring Strange Things.
Please bring strange things.
Please come bringing new things.
Let very old things come into your hands.
Let what you do not know come into your eyes.
Let desert sand harden your feet.
Let the arch of your feet be the mountains.
Let the paths of your fingertips be your maps
and the ways you go be the lines on your palms.
Let there be deep snow in your inbreathing
and your outbreath be the shining of ice.
May your mouth contain the shapes of strange words.
May you smell food cooking you have not eaten.
May the spring of a foreign river be your navel.
May your soul be at home where there are no houses.
Walk carefully, well loved one,
walk mindfully, well loved one,
walk fearlessly, well loved one.
Return with us, return to us,
be always coming home.
-Ursula K. Leguin